Dividing Light - Night Owl Therapy

 Bart Brassica has been toying with the idea that light, properly managed be a cure for those waylaid in the particularly slough of despondency induced by climate change, and while he has installed solar panels in his hat (out of view here) to do his bit for enlightenment, here is taking up Dividing Light-Night Owl Therapy, to improve his mood, his sleep and his complexion.  Mavis Eggwhistle has pointed out that his is a Barn Owl, but Bart is just miffed, having misheard this as Banal.  

The Barn Owl, as we can see by his look, is over the Rainbow bathing. 

Heedlessly Hot Headed Hat Project for Bart Brassica

 Subscribing to the  old adage - if you want to get ahead get a hat, Bart has been cultivating Habaneros, due to mishearing Habenero as Hat’n Eros and believing there was a gap in Huntingdon County’s winter market for Heated Headwear he has raised a  hot crop of Habaneros.  

Mavis Eggwhistle has warned him he is courting disaster if he pulls a peck of peppers like these over his peepers but Bart, as we know, is impervious to most forms of common sense, and has told Mavis, thinking any courting is better than none, that his line of Hot Hat are full steam ahead. Next up Scotch Bonnets. 

Super Foods - Fennel-culi and Fennel-cula

 Some years back Bart Brassica did some interesting work on Crop Triangles, by crossing corn with Marzipan, though later Granny Egg called in the FBI considering what she called Marxipan was a danger to voters everywhere. Unfettered, Bart always on the look out for a new super food to flog on Farmgate Fridays, has been experimenting with two varieties of Giant Marzipanised Fennel, and finding no enthusiasm to  the more obvious nomenclatures  Fennel-Pan or Marzi-Fenn, has hit upon calling them  Fennel-culi and Fennel-cula, claiming these names are more tuneful, important for the Singing Sales Pitch traditional to Farmgate Friday.  Bart can’t carry a tune in a bucket, he is hoping that one of the Farmhands, all of whom he has called in to audition, will have some tenor-acity. In case they don’t show up he was bugged the Farmhands quarters to get the inside running. 

Sleep, Quite the Universal Panacea

Sleep, like peace and quiet can be quite elusive, and on spelling, far be it for me, a known sloppy speller,  to cast the first nasturtium, and who is to say that a full stop should not take a nap mid-sentence, and given  that  the link between  upper case and en-titlement is well established, and there being not doubt that at any given moment people right across the planet packing in the zeds, and the endearing slight wobble that offsets the sure and decisive lettering of this directive, of  all of this it must be said, albeit quietly so as not to disturb anyone dozing, that this notice is a true piece of vernacular art. Quite.